A day in the Life of CN

i’ve been told i need to write more.  i’ve been told i need to shoot more.  i’ve been told that i need to settle down.  all things i want, i think.  good recommendations and requests from people i value.  the things that i tell myself are the ones i listen to, or so i tell myself.  i’m back to philly for a day and managed to check everything off my to do list.  it was a long one but easily accomplished when i take the time to focus, not get distracted by the other things and do what needs to be done. 


 prioritize, itemize, customize, finalize.


im packed and ready to head to NYC tomorrow.  more fun, adventure, wind, maybe snow. more pictures, frivolity, friends, maybe a show.  even when its cold it still feels like home.  even in the rain so does SF.  and as much as i try to deny it and tell myself i made the right decision, i never should have left DC.  
where will she stop, nobody knows…

i’ve been told i need to write more.  i’ve been told i need to shoot more.  i’ve been told that i need to settle down.  all things i want, i think.  good recommendations and requests from people i value.  the things that i tell myself are the ones i listen to, or so i tell myself.  i’m back to philly for a day and managed to check everything off my to do list.  it was a long one but easily accomplished when i take the time to focus, not get distracted by the other things and do what needs to be done. 


 prioritize, itemize, customize, finalize.


im packed and ready to head to NYC tomorrow.  more fun, adventure, wind, maybe snow. more pictures, frivolity, friends, maybe a show.  even when its cold it still feels like home.  even in the rain so does SF.  and as much as i try to deny it and tell myself i made the right decision, i never should have left DC.  
where will she stop, nobody knows…

four walls standing steadfast, strong
bricks and mortar filled with girl like wonder
the comfort of the place called home that smells of this curious sweetness

strike a match and watch it burn
not on purpose but purposefully
why should you sleep soundly?
at least you’ll still be warm

as the line across the sky pointing in the right direction leads…
but which way does it say?

and when night falls again and the shivering cold sets in, sit in your ashes
and breathe it in
contentment in your self created solitude

when you drive too straight and can’t see cleary do you still end up where you should be? foggy passageways through corridors into the downtown escape route. fleeing to that place where the grass is always greener.

sore neck still throbbing from stretching it out for those that aren’t me. “i need a hero”, she sings. and here I come to save the day as usual. packed and ready to run. away from you and him and her and that guy too.

empty seat in first class waiting for me. sadly stuck between the sleeping walruses, snoring to the sound of my flight of fear. forced to wait, proving the point of it’s possibility. “excuse me flight attendant, make this a stiff one”. its gonna be a long strange trip.

when you drive too straight and can’t see cleary do you still end up where you should be? foggy passageways through corridors into the downtown escape route. fleeing to that place where the grass is always greener.

sore neck still throbbing from stretching it out for those that aren’t me. “i need a hero”, she sings. and here I come to save the day as usual. packed and ready to run. away from you and him and her and that guy too.

empty seat in first class waiting for me. sadly stuck between the sleeping walruses, snoring to the sound of my flight of fear. forced to wait, proving the point of it’s possibility. “excuse me flight attendant, make this a stiff one”. its gonna be a long strange trip.

sitting solemnly in one of my favorite places to get lost.  the weather is shit which makes my body hurt.  my mind still swimming from the whirling dreams floating in the rain water.  the sound of the splatters hitting the tin roof where i sleep, helped me to dream of things that wouldn’t have found me awake.  waiting for the rain to return so the photographers ideas can come to fruition.  waiting for the rain to come.  waiting…

sitting solemnly in one of my favorite places to get lost.  the weather is shit which makes my body hurt.  my mind still swimming from the whirling dreams floating in the rain water.  the sound of the splatters hitting the tin roof where i sleep, helped me to dream of things that wouldn’t have found me awake.  waiting for the rain to return so the photographers ideas can come to fruition.  waiting for the rain to come.  waiting…

“Time to tell me the truth
To burden your mouth for what you say
No pieces of paper in the way
Cause i cant continue pretending to choose
The opposite sides on which we fall
The loving you laters if at all
No right minds could wrong be this many times

My memory is cruel
Im queen of attention to details
Defending intentions if he fails
Until now, he told me her name
It sounded familiar in a way
I could have sworn i’d heard him 

“Time to tell me the truth
To burden your mouth for what you say
No pieces of paper in the way
Cause i cant continue pretending to choose
The opposite sides on which we fall
The loving you laters if at all
No right minds could wrong be this many times

My memory is cruel
Im queen of attention to details
Defending intentions if he fails
Until now, he told me her name
It sounded familiar in a way
I could have sworn i’d heard him 

starlight starbright, sparkle and fade into the dark oblivion
overwhelming glow of night 
of distant dreams of summer
and the life well spent
of the girl ill never forget


wading through the bush
heading toward the magic box
full of the kindle that sparks the flames 
of the hottest fire closest to the gapping hole
glitter, burn and fade away